Category: Rants

‘Can I be your sub?’

This particularly inane question comes in two main variants; either in the opening message, or after a few questions about me, with very little effort to engage with my answers. In short, if you’re asking, then the answer is very probably no. D/s dynamics develop organically, over time. They take

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The Taming of the Shrew

Shakespeare is perhaps not the first place that someone’s mind might go when thinking of D/s, but I have been fond of ‘The Taming of the Shrew’ since I first read it. For those unfamiliar with it, here’s a quick plot synopsis: A wealthy man of Padua has two daughters;

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‘Ask me anything’

I have been answering quite a large volume of messages recently, and I thought I would write some posts on the things which bother me most often, and why. I would think I am not the only Domme who is bothered by these, but your mileage may vary. ‘Ask me

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‘So, what do you like doing to your subs?’

There’s a question that has been doggedly pursuing me, in its assorted variants, throughout my interactions with potential submissives: ‘So, what do you like doing to your subs?’ It seems a fairly innocuous question – a casual question about my interests to see whether they align. How could I possibly

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Submission Is Not Weakness

The link bewteen submission and weakness has always been present, and the increasing emphasis on ultimate personal autonomy has only strengthened that idea.

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Due Deference: ‘Masculinity’ and Approaching a Domme

Having just written about how male submissives frequently sabotage any chance of successfully developing a dynamic with a Domme through ‘pedestalising’ them – approaching them with platitudes about ‘service’, ‘worship’, and whatever else they expect a Domme would want to hear, instead of an actual conversation – I am prompted

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Fifty Shades: My Addition to the Eternal Controversy

Hectolitres of electronic ink have been poured out by various bloggers in the BDSM community on the subject of the ‘Fifty Shades‘ trilogy and, in many respects, the matter has been written into its grave. I think pretty much everyone has read the resounding criticisms of Christian Grey as a

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