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Thoughts of a Lifestyle Domme

I'm a lifestyle domme. These are my thoughts. /fin

Okay, but somewhat more seriously, dominance has been a part of me for as long as I can remember. Long before I really knew what it was. I pursued D/s as soon as I could and now have a 24/7 TPE dynamic . Over the years, I've written articles, guides, created resources and other bits and put them in one place. And you've found it.

Have a browse, have a read and do have fun.

Latest Articles
The latest articles, guides and essays
Quick Thoughts
Posts closer to the style of a conventional 'blog' than my usual articles - rough sketches of ideas, posted with minimal editing and review,  possibly to be revisited at some later date. Written mostly for my own peace of mind, but feel free to tag along for the ride.

Trust is Not a Binary

This is something I have been wanting to get a proper article together on for a while and will probably write up properly at some point, but in the meanwhile,…
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opened book on grey surface

Snapshot of My Dynamic: Sunday Afternoon Reading

I often get asked what a 24/7 TPE dynamic looks like. While there are, of course, times I subject my sub to various brilliantly sadistic torments, the majority of time we spend in space does not look like that that at all. For one thing, inflicting pain on someone is tiring.…
Two coffee mugs, black and white, set against a black and white background in the manner of a yin yan symbol, indicating lifestyle D/s is about symbiosis and balance

Why Lifestyle D/s?

What does being a lifestyle domme mean and why do I have a 24/7 TPE dynamic? Here's the very post to answer those questions.
Close-up of a Black Leather Flogger

Why I Dislike The ‘Narrative of Punishment’

Amongst the huge volume of badly written, presumptuous mental bio-hazards which clog my inbox, ‘punish me, Mistress‘ is a phrase which crops up exceedingly often. Every time I open a message like this, even before the exasperation manages to catch up to me, the thought ‘for what?!’ crashes through my…
low angle photography of drop lights

On Mind Games

I have been fortunate enough to have the opportunity to explore some of the darker, CNC parts of D/s, which has included quite a lot of rather delicious mind fuckery. The high has been intense and beautiful. It has however proven surprisingly difficult to talk about, because the first question…

Due Deference: ‘Masculinity’ and Approaching a Domme

Having just written about how male submissives frequently sabotage any chance of successfully developing a dynamic with a domme through ‘pedestalising’ them – approaching them with platitudes about ‘service’, ‘worship’, and whatever else they expect a domme would want to hear, instead of an actual conversation – I am prompted…
Black and white of textured background representing row of vertical beams with shadow in contemporary house

Fifty Shades: My Addition to the Eternal Controversy

Hectolitres of electronic ink have been poured out by various bloggers in the BDSM community on the subject of the ‘Fifty Shades‘ trilogy and, in many respects, the matter has been written into its grave. I think pretty much everyone has read the resounding criticisms of Christian Grey as a…
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Silken Claws.
Welcome to the thoughts of a lifestyle domme - a collection of articles, writing, rambles and otherwise on femdom, power exchange, and kink in general.
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Please do not use or reproduce any of my work without prior written consent.